Heybabeimwearingurpanties
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
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