so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
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I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize