what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
