so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
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