my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
if only i could text you this smell
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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