Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
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