I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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