god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Dick very happy bro
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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