No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
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