I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
