did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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