what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
