just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
