I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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