New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
