its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
