just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
