if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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