i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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