her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
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