He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
