i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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