I accidentally had phone sex last night
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize