I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
