Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
