Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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