brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My cat gives me a boner
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I understand Curling. That high.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
