I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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