Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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