We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
