I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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