So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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