There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
