i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize