just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I want to fling myself into the sun
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