So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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