You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
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