Non-Jews are for practice
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
