i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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