Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
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His hands were made for my vagina.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
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you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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