You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
