first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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