Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
