Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
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