He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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