so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
