The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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