id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I love you.
Bad choice
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
