I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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