I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
