dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize