i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I cut my penus on the lid.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
